The Encyclopedia Brown Encyclopedia

“Dollar” Bill Pesada earned his nickname because he was careful with his money and was always on the lookout for good investments. He hired Encyclopedia to check out a tip on a possible investment opportunity.

Bugs Meany was offering shares in a diamond mine. At this point, I’d have to wonder how business-savvy Dollar Bill really was. I don’t know the first thing about telling a good investment from a bad one, but I’d have to say that any investment where Bugs was involved would be a bad one. Just look at the kid’s history. He was constantly stealing and trying to defraud children with bad trades.

Even without hearing anything about this mine, I’m would be willing to go out on a limb and advise against this investment. But Dollar Bill, the sixth-grader who was so good with money they called him Dollar Bill, wasn’t so discriminating. Not only did he not immediately reject the thought of investing in something supposedly belonging to Bugs, he spent a quarter to find out if it was a legitimate opportunity or not.

Despite his nickname, Dollar Bill had a shitty business sense. That’s basically what I’m trying to say.

The two found Bugs in front of the Tigers’ clubhouse, pitching his diamond mine to a group of children. While the details weren’t fully explained, it seemed as if Bugs was selling shares on behalf of his cousin, who owned the mine. Bugs said that some of the diamonds were so large that it couldn’t even be used for an engagement ring because anyone that wore it wouldn’t be able to lift her hand.

Encyclopedia, who knows pretty much everything, could have chimed in and mentioned that the largest rough gem-quality ever discovered was over 3,000 carats, which works out to just under a pound and a half. So right away, it should be obvious that Bugs was full of shit.

Bugs explained that he understood that it could be difficult to convince them that this mine was real, so his cousin sent Bugs a sample to show off to possible investors. The diamond Bugs held was about the size of a golf ball. He said his cousin didn’t mind sending that one to Bugs because that was one of the smaller ones compared to the ones they were finding in this mine.

Dollar Bill asked if he could hold it, but Bugs refused. Bugs explained that if he let Dollar Bill touch it, then everyone would want to. He said that someone could drop the diamond or damage it. It would be completely useless if it was ruined.

As if the supposed size of these diamonds wasn’t enough of a tip-off, Encyclopedia knew that Bugs was lying. Since diamonds are the hardest substance in nature, Bugs wouldn’t need to worry if someone dropped the diamond. Nothing those kids could have done would have damaged it.

Dollar Bill learned an important lesson that he should have learned a while ago; Bugs Meany’s an ass.

The Brown Detective Agency had an unlikely customer one morning; Bugs Meany. He was carrying a carton of eggs. He needed Encyclopedia to guard the eggs and to bring them to the intersection of Main and Elm Streets at 1 p.m. He explained that he’d ask one of his fellow Tigers, but they were all busy.

Encyclopedia opened the carton and it didn’t seem like there was anything special about them; it was a dozen normal looking eggs. He asked why Bugs needed him to bring those specific eggs to that specific location at that specific time, but Bugs answered that it was personal and it wasn’t important for Encyclopedia to know any of that for the job.

When Bugs left, Sally expressed her disbelief and said that she was sure something was up. Encyclopedia, whose naivety dripped through his pores, suggested that Bugs was trying to turn over a new leaf.

Encyclopedia showed up where he was supposed to and soon found out that, yep, it was a trick. Bugs appeared with an unnamed police officer and told some story about how he had seen Encyclopedia carrying a carton of eggs. He said that Encyclopedia looked suspicious, so he followed him and watched as he threw two eggs at windows of a house. Bugs said that Encyclopedia did that to create business for himself, so that his victims would hire him to find out who had done it.

Bugs even pulled out a bag that had pieces of the eggshell as evidence. I’m not sure how that would be evidence of anything, it wasn’t as if the police would be able to match the shells Bugs had with the eggs Encyclopedia had. Bugs’ stupidity knows no limits.

Encyclopedia pointed out that if he had just egged someone’s house, there would have been eggs missing from his carton. Since he was carrying a full carton, it couldn’t have been him. And since Bugs said he had followed him the whole time, Encyclopedia couldn’t have replaced those eggs without him knowing about it.

Bugs confessed to trying to frame Encyclopedia and he “had to clean both the windows at the house as punishment.” Well, yeah. I should freakin’ hope so. Someone egged that innocent person’s home. Either Bugs did it himself or he happened to have found a house that someone had egged and decided to use that fact for his latest attempt to try to frame Encyclopedia. The latter seems pretty far-fetched, so that means that Bugs egged this house.

His only punishment was that he had to clean up the mess that he made himself? Did he get any punishment for framing an innocent person? Or lying to police? How about for egging someone’s house specifically to lie to police about it and frame an innocent person? Extremely lax punishment like this is the very reason why Bugs keeps pulling this shit.

A fifth-grader named Gordon Borden was in a rush when he passed by the Brown Detective Agency. Bugs Meany was selling photos of UFOs and he didn’t want to miss it.

Here’s a little background information about this kid. His nickname was Flash because he was a big fan of flash photography and taking pictures at night. Believe it or not, that’s not the dumbest thing about that nickname. The dumbest thing about that nickname is the fact that he went by Flash Borden. That would be a pretty good nickname if his first name wasn’t Gordon. Only in Idaville could a boy named Gordon Borden earn the nickname Flash and not go by Flash Gordon. How does this entire town suck at nicknames?

Flash had no idea if the pictures Bugs were selling were real, so he hired Encyclopedia to get his opinion. They went to the Tigers’ clubhouse where Bugs was giving a sales pitch to a group of children.

Bugs pointed out that the pictures were authentic and stamped by the United States Air Force. The photos even had a time and date stamp. He made the point that accusing him of faking a photo would be one thing, but accusing the Air Force of doing that would be unpatriotic. That doesn’t even make the slightest bit of sense, because no one would be accusing the Air Force of faking the photo. However, this is the type of specious reasoning we should expect from Bugs.

Encyclopedia and Flash looked at one photo and saw that it was stamped 4:47 p.m. on June 24^th. That was the same date as that time that jeweler pretended the Roman Numeral Robber stole his watch. What is it with that date?

Encyclopedia told Bugs that the photos were fake. Bugs didn’t like Encyclopedia treading on ’merica, but Encyclopedia explained that he wasn’t saying that the Air Force faked them; Bugs did. He knew that because if the Air Force had put the time stamp on the photo, it wouldn’t have read “4:47 p.m.,” it should have read “16:47,” because they would have used military time. Bugs confessed, and the children went home, probably to eagerly await the next scam.

I feel like I should note that 4:47 p.m. was more than three hours earlier than the time the sun sets in Florida on June 24^th, so it was nowhere near being night. That is not to say that the kid who was into nighttime photographs would be any less interested in a photo of a UFO. All it means that there was no reason for us to learn about his fascination with nighttime photography and his dumb nickname.

Rico Ayres’ family had recently moved from Glenn City to the house next to Bugs Meany’s. Rico had invited Encyclopedia over to show off his insect collection, but Encyclopedia noticed that the whole time he was there, Rico spent most of the time showing off his grandmother’s moonstone ring. He also noticed that Rico kept nervously looking out of his window towards Bugs’ house. However, when Encyclopedia asked him about Bugs, Rico said that he hadn’t met the neighbors yet. When Encyclopedia left, he noticed Bugs looking out of the window, watching him.

As Encyclopedia was recounting the story to Sally the following day, a police car pulled up Encyclopedia’s driveway. Officer Lopez, Bugs and Rico stepped out of the car. Bugs pointed at Encyclopedia, telling Lopez that he was the one that Bugs saw leaving Rico’s house.

Lopez asked Encyclopedia if he was at Rico’s house the previous night, and Encyclopedia said that he had gone to Rico’s to see his insect collection. When Encyclopedia asked Rico to back his story up, Rico looked at the ground and mumbled about being at Glenn City the night before.

Bugs then told a story of how he had noticed a light from a flashlight going through Rico’s house the previous night. He thought it was suspicious because he knew that Rico’s family was in Glenn City. After watching the house, he noticed someone crawl out of the window onto the back porch. That’s when he recognized the intruder as Encyclopedia.

Lopez broke in to say that an expensive ring was missing from Rico’s family’s house and that they had reason to believe that someone stole it while the family was out. Since a witness put Encyclopedia in the house at that time, that made Encyclopedia a suspect.

Encyclopedia repeated that he was there with Rico, but Rico once again nervously mumbled that he was in Glenn City at the time.

Bugs went on to say that Encyclopedia wasn’t satisfied with ripping the Ayres family off because he then  went to Bugs’ house. Bugs said that he watched Encyclopedia walk over to the window and put his hands right up against the window to get a look inside. Bugs saw that Encyclopedia had a ring on his finger that matched the description of the ring. In a panic to protect his home from this dangerous thief, Bugs turned on a few lights and made a lot of noise. That sent Encyclopedia running.

Lopez was ready to take Encyclopedia downtown so that they could have this discussion with Chief Brown, but Encyclopedia said that that wasn’t going to be necessary. The reason Encyclopedia gave was kind of bullshit in comparison to other evidence that was plainly obvious.

For starters, did Lopez not realize that Rico was clearly nervous about something? While Bugs was up in Encyclopedia’s face, Rico stood back and stayed out of it. Encyclopedia supposedly broke into Rico’s house, shouldn’t Rico be the angry one? No, instead he stared at the ground, kept quiet and said as little as possible. If I was Lopez, I’d wonder what that was all about.

I’d also wonder where Rico’s parents were for all of this. It didn’t seem like they reported the crime. If they did, they seemed strangely disinterested in taking part in the police investigation of the burglary of their own home. It probably would have made more sense to question them first, and it’s obvious that Lopez didn’t do that.

I say that because there seemed to be a conflict as to where Rico was the previous night. Encyclopedia insisted that Rico was with him at the house, but Rico was unconvincingly saying that he was in Glenn City. If Lopez had asked Mr. or Mrs. Ayres, he would know that Rico was lying and that he was home at the time. Then Lopez would have saved himself the trouble accusing his boss’s son of breaking and entering. Instead, Lopez just proved how shitty of a police officer he was.

All of that aside, Encyclopedia somehow cleared his name entirely by refuting the most insignificant detail of Bugs’ story. Bugs said that when Encyclopedia put his hands to his window to peer inside the house, Bugs was able to see the ring that Encyclopedia was wearing. Encyclopedia said that it wouldn’t have been possible for Bugs to see what kind of stone was on the ring because of the angling of his hand – not because it was dark outside, thereby making it impossible to be able to properly describe details of a ring worn on the person trying to peek inside his home.

I don’t know. Light availability aside, if Encyclopedia put his hands to the glass, Bugs could have seen what kind of ring Encyclopedia was wearing, depending on the angle of the hands and the positioning of the ring – two details never revealed. And even if Bugs imagined being able to see the ring, this doesn’t disprove the possibility that Encyclopedia didn’t break into the Ayres’ home and steal a ring. Just because he didn’t appear to have the ring it didn’t mean he didn’t break in.

But since Lopez was convinced that the angle of Encyclopedia’s hand was the one piece of evidence needed to exonerate Encyclopedia, the case was over. Rico then confessed and told Lopez what actually happened.

Bugs pretended to be interested in spiders to get close to Rico. After looking at Rico’s bug collection, Bugs bullied Rico into pretending that Encyclopedia had broken into his home and stolen his family’s jewelry. Because that’s how Bugs’ sociopathic mind worked; new neighbors = I can use them to frame the boy I don’t like for a crime that never happened.

I wonder how Mr. and Mrs. Ayres thought about this – assuming they would eventually find out. They had just moved into this new place and their neighbor’s asshole kid already had Rico lying to the police. It’s not a very nice welcome into Idaville, but it’s the sort of thing the family should probably get used to.

Young pirate-enthusiast, Davy Jones (I see what they did there), rode his bike past the Brown Detective Agency with some exciting news. The ghost of Old Cutthroat Flint had appeared at the Tigers’ clubhouse and Davy was going to ask him where his treasure was buried.

Old Cutthroat was a legend in Idaville. He was a pirate who spent a lot of time hiding out in what would later become Idaville and the surrounding areas in the 1800s. By the way, there seems to be little to no historical basis for the idea that a pirate with an English name, would be hanging around Idaville around that time, but whatever.

Legend had it that his crew staged a mutiny and Old Cutthroat was beheaded. His ghost was said to have been searching for his head. Old Cutthroat’s treasure had still not been found.

Davy seemed to think that simply asking the ghost where it was would be the best way of finding it. I’d question his logic, but it’s probably safe to go with the assumption that Davy isn’t a very bright child.

Bugs Meany capitalized on the fact that Old Cutthroat’s ghost happened to appear at his hangout. He was offering neighborhood children a chance to see the ghost for just a dime. For a quarter, someone could speak to the ghost. Davy was going to pay a quarter and find out where the treasure could be found.

Encyclopedia voiced his disbelief that Bugs was telling the truth and began pointing out holes in Davy’s plan. He wondered how a headless ghost would be able to tell Davy anything. Davy seemed genuinely surprised and upset that Encyclopedia didn’t believe the idea that Bugs was telling the truth, and he paid Encyclopedia a quarter to disprove Bugs. As a bonus, Davy gave Encyclopedia a candy bar.

The two went to the clubhouse and got in line. After seeing some of the reactions the ghost was getting, Davy began to lose his nerve. Instead, he gave his admission money to Encyclopedia so that he could talk to the ghost instead. When Encyclopedia got to the front of the line, he told Bugs that he was determined to prove that that was not a ghost. Bugs warned him that they were not responsible for what happened in there. He and Tiger member Duke Kelly counted to three, opened the door and pushed Encyclopedia in, slamming the door shut behind him.

Encyclopedia and the pirate exchanged standard pleasantries until the ghost noticed that Encyclopedia had a candy bar in his pocket. The ghost grabbed the candy bar, told Encyclopedia to leave and then hid behind a stack of crates. At that moment, Encyclopedia was pulled outside.

Clearly, this wasn’t a ghost, just someone with his shirt pulled over his head.

Encyclopedia pointed out that ghosts aren’t able to grab things – in this case, a candy bar – out of people’s hands. With that, Bugs confessed that the whole thing was a lie and that the ghost was just fellow Tiger Rocky Graham. He returned all of the money to the children.

What was keeping Bugs from lying and saying that Encyclopedia was so scared that he dropped the candy bar? Or he could have made up some story about how they saw Old Cutthroat’s ghost had been moving things earlier that day. That’s normally what Bugs would have done in that situation.

Instead, Bugs gave up the moment Encyclopedia voiced an ounce of flimsy suspicion. I would respect Bugs more if he actually showed some commitment to his bullshit shenanigans.

Sonia Easton ran a very successful lemonade stand and donated the money she earned from it to the hospital. Encyclopedia and Sally stopped by her stand to cool down on a hot summer day. They stuck around to shoot the shit with Sonia for a while. Sonia talked about how good business was for her that summer, even going so far as to pointing out a stack of cash that she had earned. Things were going so well, she was able to leave town for a week to visit family in Tallahassee. Sally grew concerned and asked why all that money – more than $300 – was lying around and wasn’t in a bank. Sonia explained that a television news crew had been by earlier that day to do a story about her. I suppose the news crew wanted a shot of the cash itself, though I don’t understand why.

While they were hanging out, Bugs Meany appeared. Sonia gave him a scornful glance, saying that he hadn’t bought lemonade from her once, but tried to elbow his way on TV once the news crew showed up.

A bit later, Sonia’s mother came out to tell Sonia to pack the stand up. The two detectives helped her carry her supplies into her house, lock up the stand’s shutters and close the side door. They went on with their day, and Encyclopedia didn’t think about Sonia until he got a strange phone call the next morning.

The caller identified herself as Sonia, though it didn’t really sound like her. In a panicked voice, the caller – I think we all know where this is going, it was Bugs pretending to be Sonia – told Encyclopedia that money had been left in the stand and that it wasn’t safe. The caller said Sally had already been called and that (s)he wanted them to take the money and keep it safe until she returned to town.

Sally and Encyclopedia rushed to the stand and they discovered that “Sonia’s” concern was legitimate. While the front shutters were padlocked shut, there was no lock on the stand’s side door. They opened the door and the money was still inside. When they went inside to retrieve the money, a fisherman’s net fell onto them, trapping the both of them. Then Bugs appeared from behind the stand and yelled for the police. In a stunning coincidence, a patrol car had just happened to pass Sonia’s house at that exact moment. At that point, Encyclopedia realized that he and Sally didn’t get a call from Sonia, it was Bugs pretending to be Sonia.

Bugs told Officer Muldoon his delusional side of the story. Bugs had heard the two detectives plotting to steal the money from the lemonade stand the previous night, so he decided to set a trap to catch them in the act. As far as Bugs was concerned, he “caught them red-handed.” To show that Bugs was the good guy in all of this, he added a dime to the stack of cash that was sitting on the shelf in the stand.

Muldoon had heard enough, and he was about to take the two downtown, but Encyclopedia was able to “prove” that Bugs was lying. And with that, Muldoon took Encyclopedia and Sally to the bank to deposit the money in Sonia’s account.

What was the proof that Encyclopedia had? Bugs had said that they had been “caught red-handed.” For that to have been true, the money would have been on them; either in their hands or their pockets. Since the money was still on the shelf when Bugs added his dime, Encyclopedia and Sally weren’t exactly “caught red-handed.”

Basically, Encyclopedia’s entire argument was whether or not Bugs was using the phrase “caught red-handed” 100% correctly. For them to have been caught red-handed, Encyclopedia or Sally would had to have had already taken some of the money. Since they did not take the money (yet), Bugs used the phrase improperly and therefore his entire version of the story should have been rendered void. That was all Muldoon needed to hear. Apparently, Idaville has a strict rule about semantics; if you witness a crime, but misuse a phrase while reporting it to the police, the suspects get set free.

I don’t understand how Bugs’ misusing this phrase proves anything; especially because Encyclopedia and Sally were there specifically to take the money. Had the net fallen onto them a minute later, Encyclopedia and Sally would have picked up the money, so they really would have been “caught red-handed.”

And was Bugs’ plan really to set up a net, call the two detectives over and then hope the police would show up at the right time? Why didn’t any of this look suspicious to Muldoon? Bugs was claiming that he knew that there was money in this lemonade stand and that he learned of someone’s plan to take the money. Instead of alerting the authorities, or hiding the money from the would-be thieves  Bugs decided to play vigilante. Only, not really, because it seemed that big step in the process was to have the police show up. Though, it didn’t seem all that important, because Bugs didn’t actually call the police; he was just lucky that one happened to pass by at the right time.

But the one thing that makes the least sense in this story is how Sonia managed to leave the money in the stand that didn’t lock. First of all, why bother even putting a padlock on the front shutters when there was no way of locking the stand’s side entrance? Secondly, Sonia just completely forgot that she had over $300 sitting out in plain sight in the stand? It wasn’t just Sonia who goofed up; we learned that Encyclopedia and Sally both helped Sonia move supplies from the stand to inside her house. That means that three people were gathering objects and moving them elsewhere, and when almost everything was moved out, they all asked themselves, “Anything else?” did a quick scan of the inside of the booth, saw the money and said, “Nope.”

Even Sally, who just earlier voiced her concern about that much cash being in the booth let that shit go. She didn’t like the idea of $300+ being in the booth while Sonia was there, but $300+ unattended in a small structure that doesn’t even lock? That was fine with her.

And Sonia’s mom let that go as well. Granted, Mrs. Easton could have had taken a hands-off approach to her daughter’s lemonade stand in the good name of giving Sonia a sense of responsibility, but there comes a point where laissez-faire parenting becomes simply negligent. She should have known that her daughter was being interviewed by a television news crew, and she should have known that, because of that interview, her daughter was going to have a lot of cash in the lemonade stand that day. Did Easton just assume that her daughter walked herself to the bank carrying over $300 in cash without telling her?

I’d hate to say it, but between Sonia’s forgetfulness, Sally’s inconsistent concern for Sonia’s money, Encyclopedia’s insane logic and Muldoon’s piss-poor police work, the one character that ended up looking best in this story was Bugs. Yeah, he lied to the police – AGAIN – and pulled his normal bullshit of doing a really bad job at trying to frame Encyclopedia, but he actually ended up accidentally being the good guy in all of this.

Sonia and her mom left town, not giving the cash another thought. Encyclopedia and Sally were off in their own worlds. Although Bugs’ intentions were messed up, he’s the one that alerted the authorities about the money being in the stand, and it was because of him that the money ended up being deposited in Sonia’s bank account.

Five-year-old Melissa Stevens came to the Brown Detective Agency after making a bad trade with Bugs Meany. He offered her what he claimed was an autographed copy of Alice in Wonderland in exchange for Taffy the Tiger, her favorite stuffed animal. Melissa went on with the deal with the promise that there was an illustration of a tea party in the book, and since she loved pretending to have tea parties in her front yard with her dolls and stuffed animals. The only problem was that the book had several pages ripped out of it, including the one that had an illustration of the tea party.

Melissa was resistant at first, so Bugs told her that there was a tiger thief loose in the town. Convinced that her tiger was eventually going to get stolen, she figured she might as well get something for it in return while she could.

Yes, that’s how low Bugs was; he tricked a little girl into trading one of her favorite stuffed animals for a badly damaged book. On the bright side, it did actually appear to be autographed. We shouldn’t celebrate that point just yet, though.

After thumbing through the book, Encyclopedia told Melissa that there was no tiger thief and that he was going to try to get Taffy back.

The two went to confront Bugs and saw that Taffy was being proudly displayed as the Tigers’ mascot. Bugs was also joined by Duke Kelly and Rocky Graham. Bugs argued that the book was worth a lot of money and that Melissa would be able to sell it and buy lots of stuffed tigers. He refused to undo the trade because he had grown attached to the tiger, which he renamed Terrible Ted the Tiger.

Encyclopedia claimed that the author had not signed that book, but Bugs said that Encyclopedia couldn’t prove that. To try to prove his point, he had Bugs write the author’s name on a blank piece of paper. Bugs grabbed the paper and wrote “Louis Carol,” and showed that, though the autograph read the same way, his writing looked nothing like the handwriting in the autograph.

Though Bugs was right, he proved that he cheated a little girl out of a stuffed animal.

Encyclopedia knew that the autograph was faked because the author of Alice in Wonderland was Lewis Carroll. Though the two names sound the same, they’re spelled differently. Bugs had found the old book which had been damaged by his baby cousin, so he had Rocky put the fake autograph on the book so that he could trick a little girl into taking it.

Unfortunately, his cousin had ripped out the book’s title page, so they didn’t know how to spell the author’s name correctly; because that’s not the sort of information that they would put on the cover or the spine.

And, for some reason, Bugs decided that the most logical step at that point would be to lie to a little girl so that he could get rid of this book that he didn’t even care about in the first place. 

Hector Heywood accused Bugs Meany of stealing a diamond ring from him. Hector had read a story in the Idaville Gazette about Mrs. van Colling’s missing diamond ring. She had thought that she had lost it while scuba diving at Warren Reef. The two divers she had hired to search for the ring were unable to find it. I’m not sure why the Gazette would run a story like this; perhaps it was a slow news day.

Hector discovered the ring on the beach, which explains why the divers were unable to find the ring in the water. While Hector was on his way to van Colling’s home to return the ring, he ran into Bugs. He asked Hector where he was going, and Hector voluntarily told the known-bully with a long history of stealing things that he had a ring that he was going to return for reward money in his possession.

Bugs, obviously, took the ring. Since Bugs is a complete idiot, he didn’t go straight to von Colling’s home to claim the reward, he went back to the Tigers’ clubhouse, as if every single person that had been in Hector’s position in the past didn’t immediately hire Encyclopedia to get whatever stolen item returned. Bugs claimed that he didn’t want to disturb van Colling’s breakfast, because he’s a gentleman. That’s clearly bullshit, because it’s Bugs. We don’t know what the real reason was.

If van Colling was so desperate to have her ring returned to her that she hired scuba divers and had the newspaper write a story about there being a reward for it, it would be pretty safe to assume that she wouldn’t mind having her breakfast interrupted by someone returning it.

Encyclopedia, Sally and Hector went to see Bugs to get his presumably fabricated side of the story. He told a story about how he had gone diving that morning, as he does most mornings, when he spotted a bright yellow fish lying dead on the ocean floor. He took a closer look and noticed something under it. It was the ring!

Sally called Bugs a liar, to which Bugs took offense. He then “threw his Sunday punch” at Sally, who ducked it and counterpunched him, knocking him out. Then she panicked about punching someone who could have possibly have been telling the truth, but Encyclopedia calmed her down.

Encyclopedia explained that if a dead fish still had its bright color, then it hadn’t been dead for very long. At that point, the fish wouldn’t have sunk to the ocean floor, it would still be floating.

So Bugs is apparently too dumb to know that fish float soon after they die. How does a 10-year-old boy not know that?

The only thing more frustrating that Bugs’ thuggishness is his complete inability to cover it up with a halfway decent lie.

Encyclopedia and Sally were heading to the Tigers clubhouse because Bugs Meany had called them over for a meeting. Already, I question why Encyclopedia and Sally agreed to this. Did either of them actually think Bugs had a legitimate reason for calling a meeting with them?

When they got to the clubhouse, they saw Bugs talking to fellow Tiger members Spike Larson and Duke Kelly. They were talking about the upcoming Annual Insect Race – because, of course Idaville hosts an insect race. When Bugs saw the two detectives approach, he said, “speaking of insects… it’s the clueless sleuth and his simpleminded sidekick.” Did Bugs call them over to insult them? Encyclopedia and Sally should have just turned around right then and there and save themselves from whatever trouble they were getting into by treating Bugs like a respectful person.

No, actually Bugs called them over to hire them. That’s apparently how he greets people before he hires them. What the hell is wrong with this kid?

Anyway, Bugs was going to enter his cockroach into the race, but he was leaving town a few days before the race. He needed someone to watch his roach for him. Encyclopedia agreed, despite the several reasons why he shouldn’t have. 1) Clearly, Bugs was up to something. 2) Sally warned him against it. 3) Encyclopedia wasn’t in the bug babysitting business. 4) Why would Bugs ask Encyclopedia for this favor?  See Reason #1. 5) Why would Bugs ask Encyclopedia before one of his friends?  For example, Spike and Duke were sitting right there. See Reason #1 again.

Bugs told Encyclopedia that he would be back in town the day of the race, and to meet him at the race ten minutes before the event started. Encyclopedia took care of the roach like he was supposed to. He and Sally showed up at the park as planned, but Bugs was running late. Encyclopedia took one last look at the roach to make sure it was okay.

Minutes later, Bugs appeared and rushed over to Encyclopedia and grabbed the box with the roach in it. He said he needed to get it warmed up before the race. He walked away to help this bug do these supposed exercises. He returned shortly after, accusing Encyclopedia of killing his beloved roach. Encyclopedia looked inside the box and he saw the bug’s shiny back, but it wasn’t moving.

Bugs went into histrionics, telling someone to call 911. Yes, call 911 because of a dead bug.

Encyclopedia shut Bugs up by accusing him of switching his roach with a dead one. He also pointed out that when insects die, they typically die on their backs, with their legs in the air. This bug was on its legs because Bugs put him in the box that way.

Bugs admitted to switching his roach with a dead one in an attempt to make Encyclopedia and Sally look bad. Really? That was what he was going for? He paid Encyclopedia to watch his roach, and went through all of this just so in the end, people around town could think of Encyclopedia as someone who killed a bug generally thought of as a pest. Oh yeah, I bet the people in Idaville would be talking about that for years to come.

The judges caught wind of all of this and disqualified Bugs from the insect race. I don’t understand why. Don’t get me wrong, I think Bugs is a twerp. He shouldn’t be allowed to do most things. However, this stunt that he pulled with Encyclopedia had no effect on the insect race. It wasn’t as if he cheated. He didn’t sabotage any other entrant. It had nothing to do with the race itself.

Pablo Pizarro appeared at the Brown Detective Agency because Bugs Meany accused him of stealing a banana, which led Pablo to lose his job.

Every summer, Idaville sponsored the Art in the Park program for children, headed by Monsieur LeBlanc. LeBlanc was a famous painter who was also known for having an ugly temper. That seemed like the perfect person to be around children. He also seemed insistent that people referred to him as Monsieur LeBlanc and not Mr. LeBlanc. I’m not one of those “Yer in ‘merica. Now talk ‘merican” people, but insisting on everyone using “monsieur” seems weird.

LeBlanc had hired Pablo to be his assistant for the entire summer, and it was going well until the day Bugs got him fired. Pablo wanted Encyclopedia to clear his name.

The lesson that day was still-life paintings. That morning, LeBlanc went to the store and picked fruit for the students to use as a subject. He insisted that that the bowl of fruit had to have the right balance of three apples, two pears and two bananas.

LeBlanc taught the first two sessions without Pablo’s help. Soon after Pablo arrived before the third session, LeBlanc took a break. When LeBlanc returned, he noticed that one of the bananas was missing. Bugs told LeBlanc that Pablo took it, so LeBlanc fired Pablo in a fit of rage – no questions asked – for ruining the perfect arrangement.

Encyclopedia and Pablo went to the community center where the class was being held. They saw Bugs there, and in the course of their short conversation, Bugs admitted that he was hungry because all he had had for lunch was a banana.

When LeBlanc showed up, he got angry at Pablo for returning. When Encyclopedia explained why they were there, LeBlanc allowed them to stay as long as they didn’t disturb the students. The two looked at the paintings done by the previous classes. Then, for no reason, LeBlanc decided that the two boys were disturbing the class, so he told them to leave.

When Pablo tried to explain that he had been wrongly accused, LeBlanc cut him off. When Encyclopedia cut in and said that he had proof that Bugs stole the banana and not Pablo, LeBlanc wouldn’t hear any of it.

LeBlanc sounds like a complete asshole.

Finally, Encyclopedia was able to get a few words of edgewise in. He pointed out that the paintings from the first session all had three apples, two pears and two bananas, but the paintings from the second session had a banana missing. That meant that the banana had been stolen between the first and second session, and since Pablo didn’t show up until after the second session, that cleared Pablo.

That also meant that LeBlanc’s class went on for an entire session without him noticing that the banana was gone. So how important was that banana? Or was he just not very observant?

But it doesn’t make sense that Bugs stole it. When Encyclopedia and Pablo showed up, Bugs was there and taking part in a class. That meant that Bugs was in the third session or later. Then why would have he been there between the first and second sessions? Did he go there to steal the banana, leave and then return in hopes that he would be able to blame Pablo? That seems like a lot to go through for a free banana and the chance at possibly getting someone fired. It’s not even as if there was any bad blood between Pablo and Bugs; I believe this is the first time they’ve appeared in the same story.

We learn that once Pablo’s name was cleared, LeBlanc gave him his job back. If I were Pablo, I wouldn’t want to work for that asshole again. In fact, I don’t understand why the taxpayers don’t speak up about paying for programs like Art in the Park, in which an abusive perfectionist teaches the children art.